What do you mean, were there only 3, how dare you???
I was inspired to roast a chicken with the four ingredients above. I was inspired to make the skin crispy and the meat tender like Carson's mom does. She recently told me her secret is to COVER it from the start with foil, only uncovering it for the last 15-30 minutes.
So I did.
But the skin just didn't crisp enough. In fact, it even had random spots of baldness. What the...
1. Here's where I lost my cool (see psycho apron cocktail pose below). I said, why can't I cook it like your mother. I'M A F*CKING MOTHER!!!
2. After I regained my cool (finished my cocktail) I came across a piece of crispy skin. Somewhere, angels were singing. To celebrate, I decided to make a taco. Crispy chicken skin as the shell, juicy chicken on the inside (with rice), and fatty chicken jus drizzled on top. Somewhere, vegans were crying. Oh my god gross. Oh my god incredible.
3. Oh, and the 3rd thing I did wrong was... this. Writing this blog post. Tomorrow is a new day!