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Siriously? I'm Serious: I'd Rather Not...

7/15/10

...chop onions. And this is why:


I thought long and hard about sharing this photo with you people.

Don't do it, Siri, you look like a baby being born. Oh, be quiet Self, I look naturally beautiful. What?! Are you smoking drugs again?? You look like a Smurf suffering from the world's worst migraine. Don't be mean, my readers will understand. Understand what? That your Rudolph Nose and Pimple Forehead made your eyes disappear?

Well, my "nicer" and "I don't care what you think" self won the argument, so there you have the photo of the year. Siriously, though, my eyes burn like I've set them on fire when I chop onions. I cry, I lose vision, and I have to take a 15 minute break before I continue cooking.

Anyone else experience this?

11 comments:

CrownMoto said...

Y'now you can peel the onion, then put it in the freezer for 20 minutes or so before hand and they won't make you cry when you chop them. Or, just keep them in the fridge.

Samantha Ball said...

I think you still look cute. :) They have goggles for this. My mom actually got them from Sur la tab as a prize for a game at my bridal shower. Gotta love her. My girlfriend that won them loves them! You should get some!

Andrea said...

YES! Onions drive my eyes crazy. More often than not I try to push thru the searing blinding pain (literally blinding!) and keep chopping. that usually leads to me cutting myself and lots of creative curse words. Your picture is great :)

Cheri said...

I heard once that if you keep your mouth closed while cutting an onion your eyes will not water. Sounds completely bogus to me but I did try it once and it worked!

Beth said...

I store my onions in the fridge and only breath out of my mouth when I chop them. The second you inhale through your nose the tears will come...unless it is a particularly pungent one...in that case you're screwed either way.

mdakota95 said...

you need onion goggles -- BEST THING EVER!! they sell them at sur la table - http://www.surlatable.com/product/id/155997.do?mr:trackingCode=0666AEDC-D781-DE11-B7F3-0019B9C043EB&mr:referralID=NA

Jenn said...

Love the picture!! Even if we haven't all experienced it to the extreme you have, we've all still experienced it and can sympathize for sure. I'd tell you to try freezing it, but I see someone else has already suggested that. I just heard some lady the other day say she chews mint gum??? Good luck!

Virginia said...

I never had this problem until I got lasik. Apparently, my contacts were shielding me from the insanity that is feeling like my retinas are melting while chopping onions. While I would never give up my new contacts-free life, I do wish someone had told me. It's TERRIBLE!

I never have the foresight to put them in the freezer, I just walk around another part of the house with my eyes wide, trying to air them out about half way through and at the end.

Design Wine and Dine said...

LOVE IT! Ahhh, the onion...such a love/hate! You're BEAUTIFUL!

Stevie said...

I heard that chewing mint gum solves the problem. Doesn't work for me, but it might be worth a try. Also I've found that organic onions irritate my eyes much more than regular ones. I still buy organic though. The flavor makes the pain worthwhile.... (I tell myself that....)

Saskia said...

When I cut onions my face is drenched in tears and I can barely see. After reading 'The Help', I tried the trick of putting a match between your lips while cutting. The sulphur is supposed to trap the onion's killer fumes, but it totally doesn't. If you're going to try it, just don't light the match, k? That would be trouble.

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